the call centre diary

The Birds

admin — Sat, 07 Oct 2006 15:47:25 +0000

Every night as I get near to the building I work in, by bicycle, I can hear birds singing in the dark.
It’s black so the birds should be asleep. But I don’t think they can sleep because light from the night tennis courts, on the corner of the street where I turn into the industrial park where my office is, keeps them awake.
Every night I pass those courts and hear those birds sing I think, “They must be exhausted during the day, how do they get things done? Do they drag themselves around wondering what’s wrong with them?”

The Guy Who Cleans the Office

call — Mon, 09 Oct 2006 16:13:26 +0000

After I asked him what the national dish of Hungary was, the Hungarian guy who cleans the office where I work showed me a picture of his dog.
Then he took a transparent plastic envelope full of photos out from the inside pocket of his motorcycle jacket and showed me a picture of his mother in the garden of their house in Hungary.
He also had photographs of the armchairs in his living room and some of the coloured fabric in his home and one of his television set. “These are favourite things,” he said. “I like colour and Sony”.

No Sunlight

call — Mon, 09 Oct 2006 16:35:30 +0000

At 24 past 7 I say to Alison, “Al, its not even half past 7″
‘I know. Awful.’ She says.
‘I might look for another job.’ I tell her. ‘But where else pays 7 pounds an hour for doing nothing?’
I look past Alison toward the back of the office where the more important members of staff sit.
There are 2 of them left, clacking on their keyboards at half past 7 when they don’t even have to be here.
‘I couldn’t work here everyday,’ I say.
‘Imagine living in this 8 hours a day, says Alison, ’seeing no sunlight.’

Internet Pt I

call — Wed, 11 Oct 2006 16:12:32 +0000

When I get to work Emma’s sitting at the computer I usually sit at.
She’s a day person but works Wednesday night, which is why she’s still at her desk.
I sit down next to her at the desk Alison usually sits at.
I have a sensation of slight disappointment. There are two computers out of all the customer service computers that have Internet connections and Emma’s is one of them.
“I’m disappointed there’s no Internet connection at this desk.” I say to Emma.
“There aren’t any connections anymore on any of them,” she says, “Sharon’s had them all disconnected.”

Internet Pt II

call — Thu, 12 Oct 2006 16:23:12 +0000

When I get to work I find out that internet access in the contact center has been cut off because of me.
“Tina overheard you telling Maria about the computers that had internet. Maria told Sharon and Sharon had them cut off.” says Claire.
“Tina phoned and told me.”
Alison is sitting next to me looking at me.
“Fuck, really?”
“Yeh”, says Claire.
“Shit, sorry.” I say.

Then Claire says she doesn’t care.
Alison says the same.
“ Me either,” I say.

After a bit I say, “Is there any work to do?” “None,” says Alison. “and I forgot my book.”

Talking About Some Girl

call — Sun, 15 Oct 2006 16:16:00 +0000

It was after half 5 because Claire and Carrie were already there and they start at 6, though sometimes they get there late or early so I wouldn’t have set my clock by their arrival.
We were in the office talking about one of the girls who worked there who was having problems with a guy she had been having sex with whom she thought she might be in love.
“He treats her like shit.” Claire said.
“He hates her only slightly more than he hates himself for not being able to dump her.” I said.
“Probably true.” said Claire.

Carrie is Allergic to the Cakes I Made

call — Tue, 17 Oct 2006 16:16:52 +0000

The first thing I do when Carrie and Claire arrive is to tell them I made the cakes.
I tell Carrie to take one and watch her putting it into her mouth as she walks toward the vending machine.
“The icing’s made of Philadelphia cheese and icing sugar.” I call out.
She stops and turns back toward me.
“Are you serious?” she says.
She’s walking back toward me now, one hand under her mouth, spitting pieces of cake into it.
“Im allergic.” she says.
“To dairy products?” I say.
“No,” she says, “just the idea of icing and cheese together.”

Maria’s Concern For Us

call — Sat, 21 Oct 2006 16:17:55 +0000

When I get to work at 5.30 Maria calls out to me,
“I’ll be here until 7 if you’ve got any questions.”
“Why?” I ask.
“Because I thought you might feel abandoned, you night crew.”
“Oh that’s nice.” I say to her.
Then Sharon calls out, “I owe you an apology,” she says,
“I said I’d get you in for training.”
“Don’t worry,” says Maria, “it was boring.” and hands me some a4 pages with laser printed images on them.
I notice that the picture on the first page features the lower half of a woman sporting incontinence briefs.

Emma Reveals Some Things About Her Youth

call — Sun, 22 Oct 2006 16:18:44 +0000

During a lull in phone calls Emma turns to me and says, “I met someone famous once. My face was on newspapers all over the world,” she says and then laughs. “Who was it?” I ask her. “Raisa Gorbachev.” She says. Apparently Emma was really into making lace at that age so her school chose her to hand a bit to Raisa.
“What did she say to you?” I ask her. “I don’t remember,” she says, “I was 11.” Then we sit there not saying anything. After a while I ask her, “Did she keep in touch?” And we laugh.

The Kitchen Area

call — Thu, 02 Nov 2006 16:23:12 +0000

While I’m turning to empty my cup into the bin in the kitchen area where I’ve gone to make another cup of tea, my eye falls on the water-dispenser.
I’ve never paid it any attention before, but tonight I see that it’s grey and made of a plastic that is intended to look like shining metal. I tap on it to make sure.
Faux metal, just as it looks.
Next to it is the fridge, taller and made of metal.
The real deal.
Next to that is the hot drink dispenser, towering over both.
An enthralling trio of appliances.